Part 1 - To Infinity And Beyond

Konitchi-wa my friends around the world, it’s I Carlos that ludicrously tasty English lad he’s a bit of a Crunchy Nut, but you all know him J

DAY 0 – LONDON

Well for a country that’s as technologically advanced as Japan it’s been very hard to actually find a place that’s got Wi-Fi or an open internet cafe so far here in Tokyo, but yes it’s true I have winged it to the far east the land of the rising sun and it’s, well fantastic so far and I only got year yesterday!!!

Well before I get into what’s been going on I was almost on tender hooks that I’d even make it here, with all the strikes with British Airways I’ve been concerned about the trip even happening, with a week to go I’m in a quandary whether to book hotels for the coming trip, even getting my Japanese RailPass as I want to do some pre-tour travelling, it’s like your step-toeing past a predator’s burrow in some 1950’s science fiction man-eating spider type film, knowing that your holiday depends on people you’ve never met, who don’t care who you are but whether you’ll be going is totally out of your control, well in so far in that should you re-book or wait and take the risk...fortunately I waited.

So during the height of the credit-crunch last year I thought let’s hit Japan and treated myself to Business class flights as I could never afford them at today’s prices with BA, so last minute packing done on my way to T5, after never being to this new terminal it’s quite amazing, amazingly quiet I’m guessing due to the strike...but still ruthlessly efficient through security control and on my way to “The Lounge” as BA calls it, only to be stalked by about 12 dudes all about 6ft 5 and striking similar blue and red garb, wearing sneakers as big as my head, I was surrounded by the Harlem Globetrotters, all flying First Class with BA I must have blended in as the BA staff ignored me whisked them to their premier creature comforts that must exist beyond the hallowed doors of the First Class Lounge, but for me as they go left I go right, ducking and diving past them, if I had a ball you’d mistake me for Woody Harrelson from White Men Can’t Jump, well strictly speaking ducking and diving isn’t strictly true but dammit it’s the Harlem Globetrotters!!!

Entering “The Lounge” is like stepping into another world you wouldn’t think your still at the airport, the decor reminds me of one of those Moben/DFS new kitchen, 3-piece suites adverts with all the different types of furniture around, looking for a place to park myself, I wonder towards this bar, loaded up with enough alcohol to have a REALLY! good party, but yet no-one was drinking, well okay it was 11:00 in the morning but still I’d have thought you’d cane it as it’s free, but yet looking around the room you can feel the money in the room, a multitude of travellers all on their way, the gateway to another life it feels like, yet curiously lacking in any character, lifeless I’d go so far to say...

So I hear that there’s no hot food on the flight out to Tokyo, so I figure it’s best to load up before the flight, so kettle-chips, drinks and after my 2^nd packet “The Lounge” unleashess some cold food, salad and hams with cheese from no-where, and you can sense that the people descending upon the food area is like watching a kill on a nature programme on the BBC vultures all of them descending towards the food, so of course I pile in, taking Brie, Chedder, Ham, Coleslaw, Tomato’s I retire with my stash like that’s my piece of the carcass to my seat and munch...

I overhear after I finish the plate of food that they are only having Salad’s on the flight, arrgghh can’t be dealing with that. I then head down to the gate flight’s delayed by 20mins, I spy Eat at T5, and my fav Chicken Pot Pie, I get the Very Big Bold verison to sustain me on the 11hr flight £4.99 lighter I’m now heading towards the gates it’s 12:12

Soon after leaving Eat I see a notification, on the board,

FINAL BOARDING FOR FLIGHT BA0005 GATE A10 - 12:15

12:15 Oh Crap that’s 3mins from now!!! Going from nosing around to see what nosh I can smuggle onto the plane straight to stuff my face with, I’m sent into abject panic, stopping for something as innocuous as soup I now might miss my plane...

I’m flying through T5 like you’d see in one of those chase movies, people flying left and right, “SORRY” being shouted to placate the numbers of bodies on the floor I’m sure must have been trailing meI see a lift to A10 departure Gate, soup sloshing around in it’s container holding, hoping that nothing causes a spill, else it would be a mess T5 has never experienced, but into the lift and down to the departure gate only to find about 300 people waiting...slightly less worried I’m reliably informed that they haven’t started boarding yet...sweat mopped off the brow I attempt to dignify myself again like Delboy would do in Only Fools and Horses, the staff member from BA allows me to dive in front of the crowd Woohoo! Through the final checks and onwards to the plane.

As I stop onto the plane turning the corner I’m greeted by the nice Business Class seats, I take my post at 14G aisle seat, and park it immediately. It feels great large seats a seat-belt that actually fits me I’m sold, already this is what flying should be really, spacious and comfortable, even a foot rest too, the flight attendant offers you a drink right away, this is great! They even offer to stow my soup for me which I’ll have on the flight a bit later to their obvious amusement that I’d done that.

So we’re off, as we rise into the clouds even sitting in Business Class gives you that different sensation as the plane gracefully ascends through the clouds to our cruising altitude, it’s a bright sunny day as I leave Blighty.

Within 10mins of the seat-belt sign going off the attendants, hand out our Menu cards, to my amazement there’s a full menu on-board...Smoked Sturgeon for Starters, Steak and mash for Main and Chocolate for Dessert, I’m bewildered where’s the salad, I paid £4.99 for my soup...

After tucking a really nice meal away my mind wanders away from the soup, I then don the headset to watch some movies.

Movie#1 - 2012 fist, for some reason all flights I have been on seem to have disaster movies why is that...After that I go to grab some more drinks I see out of the corner of my eye my soup sitting stoically in it’s little compartment the BA attendants have consigned it too I feel it’s watching me like I’ve been cheating on it...grabbing a drink I get back to my seat and settle in for Movie#2 - Angels and Demons, for those who read The Da-Vinci Code and were similarly disappointed by that Movie, well prepare for another disappointment though slightly closer this film is to the book, it’s still lacking in accuracy in my opinion, still nothing like watching a bit of murder mystery, another feel-good film haha.

Remember that “really nice meal” statement earlier, well I got the munchies really bad on the flight, so there’s a bar to grab whatever you want on the flight a snack attack of Cheese and Onion crisps and a couple biscuits of Highland Shortbread with a Twix and Malteasers thrown in, this kind of fills me up, I’m shocked at that amount really, only to have another couple of bags of crisps later, do I remember my soup? Heck no, so back to the seat to finish watching the film whilst munching...

Okay so by now as we’re flying towards the sunset like some cliché movie ending, it’s getting dark out there, so everyone around me is breaking out their blankets, so I do the same but trying to work out how to put the seat down into a flat bed is as I see it a challenge, I could have easily asked an attendant but I won’t be beat, I’m in IT, and troubleshooting is my business, okay so you can’t re-boot, you can’t see a manual, only some buttons, but which one...? This takes almost 10mins till finally I say screw it push the button and see what happens, and then to my own self gratification I see the seat descend into its flat position, felling quite chuffed with myself I notice that it’s not all smooth sailing, the end of the seat is running over my iPhone and my books and my new boots, so backing the seat out I have to move my stuff, so once that’s done I stand proud knowing I made it, though is a less enthusiastic crowd to provide the cheer sand applause I think not, still I then try to work out which position is most comfortable to sleep in, I manage to sleep only to wake myself up as you do when you do that sound that if it wakes you up it’ll probably wake anyone else up, well it did so I try to go back to sleep again, this happens for another 4 times before in the end I figure it’s probably safer for my own health at not being silenced by some disgruntled passenger by turning over, and finally off again I go.

It feels at most an hour before being woken up when we’re only 1hr away from Tokyo the flight is almost over before it’s begun, I figure I’ll watch another film while I’m waiting, Movie#3 – In The Air the new George Clooney film which I heard got good reviews, is to my surprise actually engrossing, which is sod’s law right, knowing that I won’t get to see the end of this filim just when your enjoying it, bugger, hope it’s on the plane on the way back I bet that same law does it to me again on the way back...

ANYWAY’S WE’RE HERE at last Tokyo, Narita Airport, 9:20Tokyo time, about 1:20am GMT, what sleep I got on the flight helps to get me into the timezone here right away.

We’re finally out of there, into the efficiency of the Japanese airport system, passport control, baggage collection and Customs in about 20mins, I love it, we’re in!